Well. over the last month I’ve tried to write, tried to blog, tried to express the chaos in my brain and I just decided to NOT, I decided to just whine, moan, complain, bit&h about it. I’ve decided to just focus on what I’m excited about, what I am happy for, what makes me jump out of bed everyday ready to tackle the days challenges & feel the success of it all.
so.. with that in mind.. I’m excited about:
- Watching my youngest rock in basketball and he keeps going after it.
- Being a part of my daughters life and seeing her grow as an adult and watching her make her path. plus she’s got my sense of humor which is pretty awesome.. (just saying)
- & of course what day wouldn’t be complete with thinking about the big cat (my oldest) and how he’s grown so much in the last 4 years that I can’t wait to see where he’s going next. I have to stop and think about when I was his age, I had him, his mother & I were just scraping to get by and every day was like a new day to conquer the world. Now I see him at that age, doing more than I could ever do at his age and he’s owning his future. I am so proud of him.
- what else am I excited about?
- Having a home this year to make Christmas what is has lacked the last 8 years. I already have started the decoration purchases (no they are not up yet), but I can’t wait to make this home a Christmas bonanza. Including a sick awesome Lego village setup complete w/ houses, villages, etc. It shall be EPIC..
- Planning out 2019 to camp more, hit the best beach spots w/ the RV and making new memories, which reminds me I need to get my booking dates lined up so i can go online on the right night to purchase them.
- Meeting new friends in 2019, fun to say that, but I truly believe that next year I will meet more people that will influence and change my life. Last few years have been challenging with friends breaking my trust, abusing my kindness and my perseverance has taught me to move forward, let it go, realize it was not the best for me and find peace in the situation. I do truly hope those that have done this find their peace, I forgive you. I also hope that those that I have not been at my best forgive me as well.
- Being down 30 lbs, yah 30. If I execute to my doctors request I have 20-25 to go and when that happens I will be down to almost pre-kid weight.. holy crappa. the good news right now is that my wetsuits fit great, my pants barely stay on (hello belts) and my energy level increases daily (except when I’m traveling 3/4 of the time.. october was rough). anyways…..
that is the top of my list of being excited about. I know there’s more to add, but the sun is out, the kayaks are packed and time to wake up the kid to get to the lake to paddle around.
next time you feel like crappa, think about what you are excited about, what is coming up in the future and relish in those feelings & emotions. Happiness comes from within and it shines thru. so.. Shine ON!!!